Why change surname after marriage?

on Aug 22, 2013 , 05:31 pm
3186 Views
(2)
(65)
I just got married last month and now I have to get my marriage registered in the court. I dont wish to change my surname and my husband is okay with it but my in-laws are forcing me to change it. I dont understand how does it make a difference and why should I change it in the first place?

Rather this whole concept of changing them after marriage is useless. I mean you have lived with a certain name for almost 28-30 years of your life and now suddenly, you are required to have another identity. I don't agree with this at all. Whats you viewpoint on this? Should a woman change her surname after marriage?
Satish Singh
your wish not compulsory..talk to your husband
on Jun 18, 2014 , 11:09 am
wow
blah
Kamov Mov
Its not a big deal but imagine your husband being called by your surname since people will assume your surname to be your husband's surname...
on Apr 22, 2014 , 12:56 am
wow
blah
Vijayasekar Sekar
Legally, any (18+) person has the right to chose to change their name or not. Personally, asking the wife to change her surname is like asking her to lose half of her identity and is plain wrong. Socially, changing ones name will make it hard for people from our past to identify us. Why lose 30 years of life and start a new one? I haven't found one good reason to do it till date.. I'd suggest not to do it and be an inspiration for all other women in the family
on Feb 12, 2014 , 11:35 pm
wow
blah
Khalil Sufi
In the present day world, a woman has an identity of her own. A child can have one mother whereas she (mother) if remarries, her child may carry the name of the person who fathered the child. For the issuance of credit/debit cards, the name of mother is the identification/recognized and not that of the husband or father. The better thing would be the identification card or whatever is the equivalent should carry the names of the mother, father and husband that could change if the woman remarries. A woman may be identified by her premarriage name. All documents such as birth certificate, educational qualifications etc., would require authentication, if she goes by the husbands name. Religion has nothing to do with the change of name. Until few years back or maybe even now, some women have Khatoon, Bibi, Begum etc. added to their maiden name. It continues even after marriage. In Islam a person will be recognised by the name of the Mother. In my humble opinion, the woman may continue with her premarriage name. What is the problem.
on Aug 30, 2013 , 12:47 pm
wow
blah
Syed Abrar
Its your religion that asks to change or your country law ,that the most important question you must ask yourself. My religion Islam For Your Information only do not allow such change but considers this a big crime and sin. You should always be known with your father surname or family name. In simple my own words marriage is contract only not a DNA change and I dotn think yet change of DNA is possible :)
on Aug 29, 2013 , 03:08 pm
wow(1)
blah
Veena Muralidharan
I never did, any luckily my husband and in laws were very understanding. I never wanted to part with the surname I had 25 years before my marriage, and I am happy that I got to keep it, because I love to keep my Dad's name as my surname as he is my super hero!
on Aug 24, 2013 , 09:33 am
wow(1)
blah
Sanju Pradhan
Hawa Badlegi .....
on Aug 24, 2013 , 07:31 am
wow
blah
Syed Abrar replies to Sanju Pradhan
kya khoob kaha, hawa badlegi , magar agar hawa badal ka toofan banjaaye tho aap kahan bachengi ?
on Aug 29, 2013 , 03:10 pm
wow
blah
Chandan Advani
Have you ever thought of having a hyphenated last name ? The most famous one that comes to mind is Kareena Kapoor-Khan. You could also make your last name as your middle name and take on your husband's last name. This is a compromise your in-laws may be willing to consider.
on Aug 24, 2013 , 03:33 am
wow
blah
Crazy Guy
Marry within your own community..else dont complain..?Whatever comes just try to accept it..Dont always expect all the things in your favor.There is a norm ,you r supposed to follow it..You chose for the mixed tie up ,now bear the burnt..
on Aug 23, 2013 , 10:32 pm
wow
blah(1)
Syed Abrar replies to Crazy Guy
ahhahah ..too funny suggestion, we are free to marry anyone, why these restrictions and why there should be such. putting things in rite perspective will help you. the woman you are marrying with belongs to her father not to her husband for any reason, she is never the property or DNA of her husband or his family , marriage is a contract to live, care and raise human race in harmoniousness way and that's it nothing more nothing less. if the couple are not compatible you have always choice to break and contract and start a fresh. ,
on Aug 29, 2013 , 03:16 pm
wow
blah
Crazy Guy
in your case,why it is wrong if you r changing your surname???Please tell us..Why dont you like to tie yourself with your husband..
on Aug 23, 2013 , 10:41 pm
wow
blah(1)
Jerzeynew replies to Crazy Guy
Your name itself suggests why you won't understand or respect her dilemma. Crazy Guy isn't it?
on Aug 24, 2013 , 02:36 am
wow(1)
blah(2)
Crazy Guy replies to Jerzeynew
What dilemma man??r you insane???a woman feels pride to adopt surname of her husband..Only in the case of mixed marriages they feel problem..In that way they try to keep their identity intact so that people will recognize them as usual before..I have no sympathy for these girls..Go to hell...system is not gonna change..
on Aug 24, 2013 , 03:54 am
wow
blah(2)
Jerzeynew replies to Crazy Guy
Instead of saying Go to hell you should start saying 'come to hell' as I am sure you are in a hell of dark age yourself. Stay happy in your rotten place but don't comment on things you don't understand.
on Aug 24, 2013 , 04:07 am
wow(2)
blah
Crazy Guy replies to Jerzeynew
So tell me what i didnt understand??Please be kind enough..what would be the surname of kid??
on Aug 24, 2013 , 07:49 am
wow
blah(1)
Gigy N/a
It all depends upon the society and faith you follow. I am a Christian and as per our belief system, a new unit is formed at marriage, comprising of the Husband and Wife. The Husband is the head of the wife and it is quite natural to retrofit your identity with your Husband...but that is my 2 cents...its a matter for choice for each individual.
on Aug 23, 2013 , 09:55 pm
wow(1)
blah
Syed Abrar replies to Gigy N/a
do not escape out with 2 cents, my dear friend you are entering into contract please let me know from Christianity if this true marriage is contract or its an eternal bonding, like the one we have with our father ? new unit is formed agreed , but its only a logical unit with a law binding document , let me know in Christianity if this contract is by any-means sanctioned by god as an eternal and unbreakable.
on Aug 29, 2013 , 03:21 pm
wow
blah
Gigy N/a replies to Syed Abrar
1. I am not ESCAPING anywhere. Where did you get that idea? Marriage in Christianity are not breakable contracts as is in your Islam. It is neither eternal. Marriage in Christianity is only parted by "DEATH". No room for divorce is allowed in Christianity as per the Bible. Marriage is HOLY and not CONTRACT for me.
on Aug 30, 2013 , 10:41 am
wow
blah
Jerzeynew replies to Gigy N/a
If husband is the head what is the wife? Please elaborate I am really curious...
on Aug 24, 2013 , 02:37 am
wow
blah(2)
Syed Abrar replies to Jerzeynew
gud question, its just like the president of the country , he is elected and in same way my wife chose and agree to marry me for I promised her to take care her in every meaning of our home and she in return promised to take home secretary job for our home that our country. :)
on Aug 29, 2013 , 03:25 pm
wow
blah
Gigy N/a replies to Jerzeynew
You are an individual..Take out your head and see what remains, to know what is Wife. If Husband is the head, the wife is the body.
on Aug 24, 2013 , 07:07 am
wow(1)
blah
Bibhuprasad Behera replies to Gigy N/a
Absolutely correct @Gigy.. nice reply
on Aug 24, 2013 , 10:05 am
wow
blah
Earn TimesPoints
Wow the discussion : 1 point.
Comment on the discussion: 10 points.
Share on Facebook , Twitter or Google+: 5 points
Hide Coin Animation
You just earned Timespoints